We like to think we always make fully informed and logical choices.
However, most of the time when making decisions, we don’t actually use all of the information available to us.
It’s simply not possible.
The complexity and variety we encounter in modern life makes it impractical.
We are all rushed, stressed, fatigued, and facing ever more degrees of uncertainty in our lives.
Incredible amounts of new knowledge and information are created each day.
Life is quicker, people and things are moving faster and further.
Everything is different, new, fleeting.
The speed at which our society is chang…
Ok, you get the point.
We just don’t have the time, energy, training, or the will, to make fully informed choices for every decision we make.
Exactly how are we making decisions then?
We resort to using only certain information or actions as proxies; shorthand ways of evaluating decisions without going into too much depth.
Robert Cialdini, in his book Influence: The Psychology of persuasion, sets out these shorthands and 6 psychological principles that influence our likelihood of being persuaded.
The 6 principles are reciprocity, consistency, social proof, liking, authority and scarcity.
1 - Reciprocity
The reciprocity principle states that if someone does something for us, we have to do something for them in the future.
Our ancestors made good use of it. It’s what allowed basic units of society to emerge. It’s allowed us to share skills and resources.
Now, we obviously do things for people we like. But reciprocity means we do things even for people we don’t like.
If we feel we owe someone, then we feel we have to do it.
The need to act reciprocally overcomes even hatred.
Even if we despise the salesman, they can make use of the rule by offering something first. EG. Giving free samples or unsolicited gifts.
Not only does it work with people we don’t like, but it works with uninvited favours!
This is because society imposes on us a desire to receive rather than reject.
It greases the wheels of the whole show and lets people take the risk of offering first.
These gifts are especially powerful if they are meaningful, unexpected and customised.
Also, so unwanted and undesirable are any feelings of not living up to our end of the bargain (and society’s opinions of those who don’t) that we can be manipulated into agreeing to unequal exchanges; we can be made to feel so indebted, that we agree to outsized favour in return.
MAKING A CONCESSION
Making a concession is one form persuading others with reciprocity.
It can go something like this:
Someone starts out with a deliberately large request, and then make a concession to then ask for a smaller favour. We feel obliged to make a concession as well.
Given our starting point was a ‘no’ for the bigger favour, that only leaves us with the option of complying with the smaller favour.
As working together is the basis of civilisation, and everyone benefits from exchange, we need a way to arrive at agreements and compromises, even when the different starting points are unacceptable to each other.
Who would make the first move and compromise on what they wanted, if there wasn’t societal pressure for the other party to make a concession as well?
So, I make a concession.
Now it’s Your turn.
The rule of reciprocity doesn’t care that you didn’t want anything in the first place, we all need to work together.
This method is often used to extract names of referrals. You don’t want to buy? Well, at least give me the name of someone else who might be interested…
Of course, there can be limits to how the rule of reciprocity works. Extremely large or exaggerated first requests don’t work, as the request is not seen as genuine and the other party is not seen as bargaining in good faith, and thus there is no obligation to reciprocate.
Other concepts can come into play when concessions are involved. As our minds tend to make comparisons between things we have seen recently, the 2nd request seems smaller that it really is, as its being compared to the large 1st offer.
This is also why you’re usually shown the most expensive offer or product first. If you buy the salesman makes a killing, if you decline, your then shown the smaller one, which both seems smaller as it is contrasted with the first product, and the salesman has also made concession, moving on to less expensive products after you rejected the first. Now you feel obligated to make a concession as well. And at least buy something…
This principle works even better if the customer has played a role in choosing or preparing the product. The customer feels obligated to participated because he seems and feels to have had a role in determining the outcome. And as a consequence is also more satisfied with the outcome.
What’s more, your satisfied customers are obviously more likely to become loyal customers, as their satisfactions can obviously make them more likely to buy again in the future.
2 - Commitment and Consistency
Another principle embedded deep within us, is our need to be (or seen to be) consistent with our own past actions.
We encounter this in the form of both internal and external pressure.
Once action has been taken, the internal pressure starts and we try to convince ourselves even more strongly of our past actions, and that feeling and believing it is the right thing to do.
If we can be persuaded to take a small step, our willingness to take a much larger step in increased.
We begin to tell ourselves that were actually acting our real beliefs.
EG answer survey, participate in review, buy products.
We use the previous steps to justify the next ones.
We can even treat being consistent, as more important than being right.
As with the first rule or reciprocity, being consistent is of great benefit to society. We don’t want to seen be indecisive, confused, flakey, always changing our minds. …
Here comes the external pressure.
We want to be seen by others as stable, consistent, rational, logical.
The desire to be consistent is even greater once triggered by public commitment. If i decide, go on record, make a stand… then we become stubborn about it.
We just don’t have the time or energy to think from first principles for each new decision or situation we find ourselves in.. Consistency is quick, efficient, less energy intensive way of navigating life.
Even small unrelated commitments can influence us if they have changed our identities.
EG. We can obtain a larger purchases, by first getting a smaller one. The person is no longer just a random stranger.
They’re now a customer. Their identity has changed. We just need to get out foot in the door…
The same with the first principle of reciprocity, the more the customer was involved in the decisions, it will improve their chances acting consistently in the longer term.
EG have clients fill out their own appointment card or have them actively respond to questions, yes, i’m coming tomorrow at 3pm.
3 - Social Proof
When deciding what is the correct way to act, we often look at what other people think is correct.
We see something is more appropriate if others are doing it, as we assume they know something we don’t.
Once again, this is a useful shortcut we use to navigate the complexity of life.
But, just like the other rules we have seen, it can be manipulated.
EG. Buskers add money to their guitar case before they start or owners keeping a line outside their store create the impression of popularity.
We are most vulnerable to social proof, when we don’t know what to do; when we are unsure of ourselves, unknowledgeable about the subject, or uncertain about the situation.
The problem is in these situation, others are looking for social proof too…
Social proof works best when we are able to examine people that we consider are just like us. This is why seller like the use an ‘ordinary joe’ and their testimonials in advertising.
4 - Liking
This principle is pretty simple. We are more likely to say yes to a request, if we like the person.
EG, Friends and neighbours are close to us and salesmen are always on the look out for referrals and names of people they can visit.
So, what are the factors that can influence whether we like someone or not?
PHYSICAL ATTRACTIVENESS
Handsome people benefit from the ‘halo effect’. Where this one characteristics dominates our perceptions of others, we unconsciously tend to associate with them attributes such as kindness, honest and intelligence.
Handsome candidates get more votes, get more job offers, and even get lighter sentences.
SIMILARITY
We are more inclined to like people who are similar to us. Those with similar opinions, similar personality traits, similar backgrounds, similar lifestyles…
This is why Salesmen can try to claim to have a similar background, come form the same town, or have similar interests to ours.
COMPLIMENTS
Someone who likes us or compliments us, we tend think them more trustworthy and like them in return. This holds true even if it’s obvious they’re trying to curry favour with us. The compliment can be about our appearance , taste, work habits, intelligence.
CONTACT AND COOPERATION
We like familiar things.
And we act more favourable towards people and things we have had previous contact with.
When we’ve cooperated on common goals we form bonds and begin to see each other as normal and reasonable and friends.
Salesmen always take our side, were on the same team, hey, I’m even fighting my own boss to get the best deal for you.
The exception to this rule is when we’ve had contact with someone or something in an atmosphere of competition, a difficult environment or some other bad experience.
CONDITIONING AND ASSOCIATION
We really do ‘shoot the messenger‘.
We dislike the person who brings bad news.
It doesn’t matter that the bringer of the news didn’t cause the bad news, our dislike is caused by association alone.
What about positive associations? Yes, Models and girls are often used for showing off cars; we tend like the cars just by association.
Athletes, celebrities, the olympics… they’re all used to endorse products and have some of the positive ideas rub off.
The connection doesn’t have to really make senes, it’s just got to be positive!
5 - Authority
Like our others rules, this one is quite useful to society on the whole.
Authority can be used as shorthand to cut through complexity of life when we are out of our depth. This is obviously true when we are young and teachers and parents know more than us. Bosses, judges, doctors, government, have great access to knowledge, recources, information, all of which that makes more willing to obey them.
Experiments have shown we will go to extraordinary lengths when instructed to by authority.
Even just the appearance of authority is enough.
Titles, eg nurse, doctor, student, lecture, professor.
Clothes, suits, uniforms can also give an air of authority.
Jewellery, cars, others displays of wealth also play into our perceptions of status.
6 - Scarcity
We find things more valuable when they are not readily available.
Normally, things that are difficult to find or own are better than those that are abundant.
It not only raises the possibility of loss or missing out, but also increases the judged value of an item.
If I miss it, it’s gone for good.
Loss weighs heavily on us. We fear more losing something more than gaining the same thing.
EG. Limit number, only 6 left.
EG. Limited time, Only 3 days left.
This rule is potent as it limits our freedom. If our choice or options or access will soon be limited, we value those things more.
Censorship makes us want banned information more.
Things that have become scarce recently are more valuable than those that were always hard to get
Competition for items also increses feeling of value eg sales bins at stores
The Customer Journey and the 6 Principles
The best principles to employ depend on the stage of your relationship.
1 – Reciprocity and liking – Are best suited at the beginning. Giving, highlighting commonalites, compliments, help build rapport.
2 – Social Proof and Authority – reducing uncertainty is a priority in this stage. Before people change they want proof that what they are doing is wise. Show the choice is well regarded by peers and backed by experts.
3 – Consistency and Scarcity – Motivating action is now the focus. I now like the speaker, and am convinced but might need a little extra push to buy.
Ciadini's 7th Princple? UNITY
In his later book, Pre-suasion, Cialdini introduced a seventh principle of persuasion.
Unity.
That person is similar to us can help us take a shine to them, as seen the the ‘Liking’ principle above.
But that a person is not just similar but actually is one of us is even better.
Not just a superficial likeness, but a shared identity.
EG. race, religion nationality, family, politics, kinship, place, region.
It can foster an even greater sense of belonging. An even greater feeling of not being like the rest, but being part of an elite club.
Rules of solidarity and kinship then apply to our relationship.
And the ultimate form of ‘Likeness’ then turns into ‘liking’.
CONTINUING RECIPROCAL EXCHANGE
Ongoing exchanges between parties change the psychological principle that governs the relationship.
The ‘Reciprocity’ principle gives way to form a relationship. Now, It is not just an unmet obligation we have.
The two parties now have a unifying relationship.
CO-CREATION
Managers who think they played a role in creating an ad liked it more than if just the employee was working on it. However supervisors are then more likely to also acknowledge that success was also due to the employee. The only way this is possible is if the boss and employee temporarily consider themselves as one unit working together.
EG. Kids share evenly and distribute fairly when they worked collaboratively.
EG. Having customer co-create can attach them to our brand.
Providing advice puts us in a merged state of mind. We link our identity with the other. Opinion on the other hand makes un introspective and focused on ourselves
